Help Me Stop This Destructive Pattern

Okay, dear friend. You said you can’t stop eating. You asked me to set you straight. So here it is.

  • ONE) It is winter. The body is craving dense, high fat, high caloric foods. It wants food. The light is low. It’s freezing. The body knows what it has done for thousands of years. Thank it for doing a good job for you. Its job.
  • TWO) Eat your foods. Enjoy them. Eat them gone. Eat a little then toss them. However you want. Binge. Savor over days. Eat them plain. Make your favorite dish with them. However. Be happy that food tastes so good. That temporarily it makes you feel so good! What joy is there in eating cardboard?
  • THREE) Accept you will feel crumby for a few days. Accept it may even exacerbate things over the next month. Don’t fight it. Don’t beat yourself up. Just accept it. You did what you did. You had your reasons. And now, you’ll journey forward. Pointing fingers simply wastes time and emotional resources. Pointing fingers is not productive except to tell you that there is resentment, fear, and anger.
  • FOUR) Resolve, after the food is eaten, to move from this place. You know your safe diet. You know what you like to eat to feel your best. Reassure your body that the feasting and celebration was great, and you thoroughly enjoyed it. You have let guilt go in favor of true appreciation. But you will now move back to where it likes to live. Routines are nice. Routines are reassuring. Rigid schedules are not. You’ve proved you’re not rigid. Good. But get back to the routine if you know that is ideal for you.
  • FIVE) When you try to get back to your routine, and you keep falling off, explore that. Again, no pointing fingers. That’s wasteful. Look. Are you really hungry? Are you really bored? Are you really sad? Are you really just wanting a distraction from the kids or the housework? Are you feeling sorry for yourself because it takes more work for you to feel good compared to other people? Are you simply tired?Then, ask yourself, what can you do. What can you do to go back to your routine? Is that routine really best for you? Or is there something about your food routine you need to change that is keeping you from easily jumping back on board? Do you need to eat earlier? Do you need to include a food that you know is marginal in your tolerance? Do you need to deal with a relationship? Are you feeling trapped by your diet, lifestyle, life?

    A struggle with the routine says there’s something that needs communicated to yourself. Either about the routine itself or the person who wants to adhere to the routine. Maybe it’s not the right routine. Or maybe it is, but the acceptance isn’t there. Just the ten pointing fingers. (Pointing fingers. Again, I say. Bad.)

  • SIX) NOW, GET YOUR HEAD ON STRAIGHT AND DO WHAT NEEDS DONE!!!!!!! WITH LOVE AND COMPASSION! 🙂 And recognize, it may not be what you thought at the beginning needed done!
Merry Christmas time! What a wonderful time! If you’re feeling stressed and frazzled, regroup. Prioritize. Lower or change expectations. Accept. Offer love and compassion to others and yourself.
The Homeschooling Doctor logoTerri

8 thoughts on “Help Me Stop This Destructive Pattern

  1. Susan

    Thank you for great words of advice gracefully given – a wonderful ‘gift’ at this time of year! Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a healthy New Year!

    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      Thank you, Susan. Comments like yours make blogging very enjoyable and rewarding. My family and I are having a super month and looking forward to even more excitement building up over the next week. Thank you!

  2. Christine

    5a) Are you getting enough sunlight? Maybe try to go out every day for the sole purpose of getting some sun on your face. And consider getting one of those “Happy Lights” for S.A.D. people. Keep it with your house plants, they’ll be happier and so will you. And – Are you hydrated? Are you sure? Being light deprived and/or thirsty from the furnace making the house dry can make you think you’re hungry. It really can.

    5b) Are you ‘air-hungry’? Lack of fresh air can mess with us in weird ways. Open 2 windows for a cross draft, even for a few minutes (but for as long as you can) every day, no matter how cold it is out there. No matter if *you* have been outside, your house still needs air. Good air circulation in the house one of those overlooked ‘weird tricks’ that can actually nudge us into feeling better, better than those cookies ever could.

    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      Thanks, Christine. Especially if I open the kitchen windows in this -10 degree F weather (-23 and 1/3rd degrees C). That’ll keep me out of the kitchen. Yes? (Wink.)

      Both very important points. The body (of which the brain is a part and not separate from) functions best with some sun and fresh air. That’s why I make my kids, “Go OUTSIDE.”

    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      Well, don’t beat yourself up about it! It took me a bit to recover from Thanksgiving myself. 🙂 Probably why when a friend called on me, I typed this up for her faster than any post in a long time… I definitely relate!

  3. EmilyMaine

    Ahhhhhh I love that idea of changing the routine if you can’t make the current one work. Or looking at what is really standing in your way if it’s not the routine. Great advice.


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