Dear God, Please

I always wonder why I ended up with this passion for nutrition that started three years ago.  It was a 90 degree, maybe even a 180–but since a medical doctor SHOULD be interested in all that is health, I’ll say 90 degree— turn from my former path.  It is not something I was ever interested in.  I was interested in finding the best chocolate chip cookie recipe.  Truly.  Truly.  Truly.  But it’s like God grabbed me, like we used to grab kittens we were housebreaking, and rubbed my nose in my mistake on the floor.  Smelly.

She’s Beautiful

When I was a kid, I had a dear friend who was always on a diet.  Remember those tuna can diets?  She exercised a lot too.  Walking.  Running.  Aerobics.  At home.  At the Y.  Exercise.  She was a beautiful, active woman.  Especially when she wore hats.  When she wore a hat, she put movie stars to shame.  Not a ball-hat.  She didn’t wear those kinds of hats.  Nice, church-like hats.  I kid you not, one little boy looked at my friend when we were in elementary school and said, “Wow.  She’s beautiful.”

As I grew with her, her weight increased.  She kept dieting.  She’d cook grand meals, and I wouldn’t see her eat.  I could see just how important losing weight was to her.  I used to always pray, growing up with her, “Please, God.  Please help her lose weight.”  I prayed for her weight for years.  I prayed desperately.  Pleadingly. The prayer of a child.  The prayer of a friend.  Despite her weight and her numerous diets, she kept right on being active.  Her activity was an inspiration to many.  Sometimes she’d lose 20 pounds, and I knew she was on her way!  Then, she’d gain back 30.  Over the years she finally gained back a lot more than 30 pounds.  And we had to be worried about a lot more than just weight.  So worried.

I’d Rather Be Fat Than Keep Trying

Food, which does deserve a high value, has become so cheap, so crappy, so disgusting, so pushed, it is killing us.  Here, eat another cookie.  Here, we don’t have much time, let’s run through McDonald’s.  (Yes, I used to eat here weekly.  And Chik-fil-A weekly.  And the Mexican restaurant weekly.)  And we sit there and ask why we feel so bad.  (Yes, I used to feel exhausted every day with headaches every day.)  We wear our health problems like a badge.  We say, “I’ve tried that diet.  I’ve tried that diet.  I just can’t lose the weight.”  It gets so hard.  My friend told me, “I’d rather be fat than keep trying.”  But consistency requires a lifetime of action.  My house doesn’t stay clean because I clean it once.  The baby’s diaper doesn’t stay poop-free because I change it once.  I’m not a good mom just because I pushed my kids out of my womb one day.

Stick to Real, Whole Foods And Willfully Shun Any Foods Which Lead You Down the Wrong Path.

You do not deserve to hurt so badly from food.  It IS hard.  I know it IS hard.  But keep trying.  Don’t see your failure as an endpoint.  See each day you try anew as a testimony to your stubbornness.  Choose real, honest foods.  Replace dry, hard foods with fresh vegetables and fruits.  Fill your day and life with as many vegetables and fruits as you want.  Even now, I am sitting beside a large tray of peaches and apples.  Toss in some nuts for salt and crunch.  Round out with some high-quality protein as fresh as you can afford.  (I like wild-caught fish, pastured pork, and eggs from chickens who roam free.)  Baked goods with sugar and/or white flour should be exceptionally rare treats.  Baked goods with any kind of flour and sweetener should be non-daily treats.  Root out foods for an undetermined period of time that cause you to over-eat inappropriately or bring you pain.  Cut them off.  Maybe forever.  Maybe not.  One day at a time.

One Good Life

We get one life to give.  Every day I miss who my friend was.  Slowly, she went from active to sitting.  She’d choose not to go out and do certain things because it hurt too much.  Yet, still, just about every day she made time for Dairy Queen or McDonald’s.  My friend.  One of the loves of my life.  Hurting because food gripped her so tightly.  It grips many, many of us tightly.  I’ve learned in this journey the last three years, “You don’t mess with people’s food.”  There but for the grace of God, go I.  Each day I will choose to walk this path of real, honest food as fresh as I can.  Walk with me.  Let’s live the lives we are designed to live.  Forget the guidelines, and just keep it, every bite, as fresh as you can.  Every–darn—bite.  Maybe my words fall on soil that is too hard, too dense to cultivate in my friend.  But maybe not.  Maybe my words aren’t meant for her.  Maybe they were meant for you.  Let’s choose to live.  Try again.  Today.

~~Terri

PS:  Where I used to see the label as “bad” or “unhealthy,” I now see the danger that lurks behind the food and its effects on cells.  For French fries from fast-food joints, I see destroyed oil getting incorporated into cells.  For dry, processed foods like crackers and chips, I see no fresh source of nutrients and supplementation with vitamins not physiologically compatible with proper cellular function.  I see FUNCTION (or loss of function, mo.re accurately) as the problem, not FAT.

18 thoughts on “Dear God, Please

      1. Tess

        I have made a copy for my mom and a few others who think I am crazy for feeding my family the way I do. Yet, they struggle like your friend. Being a doctor, adds the magic touch to your words! Thank you so much for taking the time to share!!

      2. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

        Thank you, Tess. As a doctor who now can’t stop reading biochemical pathways that I once couldn’t wait to forget, I KNOW you are not crazy. But as a person who was brought up eating Big Macs (two) and a Peanut Butter Twix after school—and whose mom always brought the snacks for school parties—and who LOVED to bake and eat what I baked—-I have this food pull that I think permeates most of our society. When I said, “There but for the grace of God, go I.” I meant it with all of my heart. And if I can stop just one person’s pain from food, whatever kind of pain it may be, I count every headache; every GI malady; every blue day that came from food intolerances I didn’t know about; every day of exhaustion I couldn’t explain–worth it. (But I also know that change is beyond hard.)

        Take good care of you and yours.

        Fond regards,

        Terri

  1. Tim

    I know you are all busy, but watch this short video of Jack Lalanne, explaining his diet transformation and advice. As timely in the ’50’s as it is now. Had everyone listened to him, what a different world this would be!

    Oh, I’m so mad! There used to be a whole string of Jack’s old TV shows on YouTube, but they have all been removed for copyright violations. Shame, they were very motivational. I did find these, though. If you have an hour or two, watch them all!

    https://www.youtube.com/user/jacklalanneofficial/videos

    I love this guy! The original fitness guru.

    Reply
    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      I loved this guy! He inspired and motivated me! Bam. Bam. Bam. “If nature didn’t make it, don’t eat it…” Which food culture does that describe? Any of the good ones! The little clip piqued my interest so I Googled him. Yep! Yep! He had so many great ideas and such passion! And trying to reach normal people!

      Reply
  2. EmilyMaine

    You are such an inspiration. I love your example about cleaning the house and changing the diaper. We have to consistently do things. Life is a journey and food is definitely a big part of that.

    Btw…loving the new blog header pic!

    Reply
    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      Thanks, Em. We were watching Star Wars last night. Yoda said, “Do. Or do not. There is not try.” Or something like that. It seemed kind of harsh to poor Luke. But then I realized it wasn’t, “Succeed. Or do not succeed.” It was simply “Do.” Yeah, well, I don’t know. Sheesh. It’s just Star Wars. 🙂

      Chin up. Eyes straight ahead. And let’s me and you have a great week!

      Terri

      Reply
      1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

        My husband offered his take on the Yoda quote. He said he saw it as mindset. You have a “Do.” mindset and a “Try.” mindset. I like that thinking about it that way too.

        Okay. I’ll quite playing comment tag. 🙂

        Terri

  3. Jhanis

    When I grow up, I want to be like you. I want to be able to say ENOUGH and eat right, feed my family right. Yes, we still go to McDonald’s at least once a month, I still buy canned tuna because it’s convenient and darn it, why is it so hard to buy eggs from chicken that roam free considering that we live in a third world country where cows roam free! LOL Slowly but surely, right? I’m trying to remove rice from my diet, husband says no way hahaha. He loves rice!

    Reply
    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      Laugh-totally-sarcastically-out-loud. (LTSOL) Explain to me why is it that you can’t get free-range eggs and cheaper fresh tuna there. Well, anyhow, lead one of those cows back to your apartment and tie her up. 🙂 You’ll have good milk products, anyhow. I mean, whose cow is it anyhow? Right? She’s “free.”

      Lest I seem hypocritical! We eat canned tuna occasionally too! And rice. (But we did cut them out and lots of other stuff for about a year or more while we shoveled in really, really nutrient dense, fresh stuff. Now, though, we’re on the journey of finding balance and teaching the kids that the curry is the nutrition, and you just need a little scoop of rice.) But I’ve got you beat on McDonald’s. (“Nevermore,” quoth the Raven.) And my reply was way too long and will lose much in expression in type rather than audio, so I will close.

      Terri

      Reply
  4. Anonymous

    thank you so much for your inspiring blog! we have been on a journey of healthy, healing foods for three years. sadly, we seem to be far behind you! I just had to tell you this, though. my boys have aspergers,autism ODD and one with bipolar. I have tried SO HARD to implement vegies, whole foods,etc. one of my sons has real sensory issues with food, and will go on food strikes. he actually was admitted to a childrens hospital because he wouldn’t eat any of the foods for over three days. do you know what the dietician and nutrionist taught he and I? they said that if he wants only brc burritos, just go get them for lunch each day. if he only likes fruity pebbles for breakfast-no worries, they are fortified!!! stop being so strict, he is getting plenty of vitamins from the processed foods he loves. oh, and if he wont drink milk-just let him eat as many string cheeses as he wants{my idea was broccoli and kale for calcium}! so this is what they taught my son, in a childrens hospital, totally disregarding my pleas for help with sensory-eating issues!!! they didn’t even care that he will not eat one piece of fruit–EVER–not even mixed in with other foods. yeah, trying to erase those lessons from doctors from my son’s mind………but I will not ever give up!

    Reply
    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      Dear “Anonymous,” You are not “behind!” You have some really tough cases to deal with. I am sorry you are hitting a wall. I wish that wasn’t the case. I’m glad you know that folic acid isn’t the same to person with certain MTHFR deficiency disorders (which any of your sons could have–not saying they do). I’m glad you know that dairy can be inflammatory. I’m glad you know that breakfast burritos are laden with oils/fats that undermine the basic function of cellular membranes. Dang it. If they’d only stop, only make time, they’d know too. I know where they’re coming from as I was there too, where I thought all food was fine and we got enough of what we needed from it. However, I know that is sadly not the case. I’m not a person who gives up easily, so with that spin I want to say: You can do it. You can find a way. A way that bridges his sensory deficits and keeps him ingesting something of value. A way that gets valuable nutrients, including calories, in. I don’t know that way. If you have to bridge temporarily with some crap, then you have to. But you’re his mom. You’re crafty. You know him. You watch him every day. You will find that way. Together with him. Don’t give up! Giving up is the sure path to failure. —When you find some techniques that work, I’d love to read them! They don’t have to be on any set post page. If in a year, he’s eating an apple and broccoli and you think to drop back and tell me how–just come to any post and I’ll get the comment. Thanks! Terri

      Reply
      1. Anonymous

        thank you so much for your lovely reply! I will NOT give up….EVER…just some days are harder than others,right? I don’t understand your comment about folic acid and MTHFR? can you explain that to me? I am always so “hungry” for information, and I really appreciate your desire to help and uplift others. hope you had a wonderful weekend with your family…..

      2. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

        Yes! It is fairly commonish for people to not be able to use folic acid but they can use the natural folate in foods (or vitamins that are made only with natural folates). It is not everybody, but certainly quite a few. Unless a person has genetic testing, they won’t know if they have this issue or not. I will link to something I have written which I hope explains it: https://thehomeschoolingdoctor.com/tag/difference-between-folate-and-folic-acid/

        It has to do with “methylation pathways.” They come up on a lot of alternative forums. I used to skip them when I first started getting reading this stuff since I hadn’t heard of them as applied to conventional medicine, figured it was scam stuff. Shame on me. If you read something out there and it talks about “under-methylators” and “over-methylators”–this is what they’re talking about. The best to you!

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