What Kids Who Are Being Forced To “Eat Healthy” Want

As agreed upon and written by three little scheisters who have given up artificial colors, artificial flavors, most added preservatives, most grains, sugar, and dairy because they felt sorry for vegetables and fruits feeling so left out.

FrankenBerry Cereal

Yes. If they had wanted this and would have eaten it two years ago, it would have been in the cupboard. If we can change, so can you!

Dear Mom,

Here’s what we want.  If you’re going to make us eat and drink “healthy,” could you…

♥  Please remember that straws make everything better?

♥  Please make hot cocoa on cold and snowy days?  (We use coconut milk.)

♥  Make fun and yummy smoothies?

♥  Use fun and colorful cups?

♥  Buy yummy fruits like bananas, apples, and grapefruit?

♥  Occasionally let us have cookies, cake, cupcakes, ice cream, Lara bars, and juice?  (Almonds and almond flour to the rescue.)

♥  Let us make our own soup or let us add some stuff to it until we like it?

♥  Make a face with vegetables on our plates?

Your Girls

There you have it.  That’s what three kids, ages 9, 8, and 4 said they wanted to help them eat “healthy.”  (The word “healthy” is a four-letter word in my house, a waste of breath and proper vocabulary.  Teeth on edge feeling:  Ditch the Word “Healthy.”)

“Mom, when I’m BIG, I’M going to eat WHATEVER I want.” —-Sure.  It’ll go great with your pink hair, all black clothes, and new boyfriend.  Go for it.  At this time, my job will already have been reduced to “advisor-when-asked” anyhow.  The many nights you climbed into my bed will be long forgotten until you decide to complete the circle with scheisters of your own.


G is also for "grainless granola bars".

Smoothie pops

A is for apples with nutbutter piped on top

11 thoughts on “What Kids Who Are Being Forced To “Eat Healthy” Want

    1. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

      Have you battened the hatches over there for the storm!!! On the change: We transitioned in May of 2012 to a gluten-free/dairy-free diet, telling the kids it was a “six-week trial.” Well, the trial worked on many of the kids’ symptoms, and I kept reading and learning about food, putting it all together with my physiology/pathophysiology. We then moved to whole foods, low/no sugar, low/no grains, low/no diary, etc. One of them was VERY upset that this was now “the way we eat” and not a “trial.” Very upset. It is hard for me because she is the most like me: loves to bake, loves to eat carbs, thrives on making others feel good with food. I still have a problem admitting I can’t eat certain foods. I’m like a teenager; I think I ought to be invincible. Certainly a little ol’ cupcake shouldn’t bring me down! Anyhow, the kids’ diet has landed on eating this nutrient-dense way every day, except holidays/vacations/birthdays/and special events. They do really well with it now, knowing “the rules.” They know their own food symptoms/side effects. When they leave the house, they may wander, but when their symptoms become too strong, I will have taught them where they need to fall back to. Food doesn’t seem like a big deal, but I have learned that for some of us, it just is. It can wreak havoc on any system it darn well wishes, including the brain.

      1. The Vanilla Housewife

        Wow, I’ve been wondering because my kids are picky eaters especially the little one. Though I don’t think we will ever have the ideal diet at home, I’d like to make a few changes. We have started actually, less processed foods, less pork and chicken. Chicken we may have to give up because we just realized recently that my husband’s allergy to it have gone worse, he can’t have a bite without everything around his eyes growing big!

      2. thehomeschoolingdoctor Post author

        I finally got fed up with their snubs and told them to just eat it. If it tastes “okay” just eat it. It’s food. It’s nourishing. And it doesn’t taste “bad.” I tell myself 200 years ago they wouldn’t have had a choice and those moms didn’t sit around wringing their hands and their kids didn’t not eat. I’m sorry about the food allergies. They are very frustrating, I think. Does he have to avoid eggs, too? Congrats on starting to move down and out on processed foods. I like pork, but I do try to limit the “dessert pork” (bacon, ham, summer sausage). Hope you all are safe and well.

      3. The Vanilla Housewife

        Eggs, crustacean, and several types of fish. We may not give up pork but will choose lean parts because we love the fatty parts lol The sun is finally up, I just got home from work so I will take a nap in a few minutes. All good here, thanks Terri!

  1. All Seasons Cyclist

    Lara Bars: One of the few prepackaged food items we allow in our house! How could you possibly go wrong with Cherry Pie? It’s just dates, almonds and unsweetened cherries — our favorite snack to take to the movies.

  2. IrishMum

    One of mine used to say that the first thing he would do when he moves out is pig out on doughnuts, now he says he has been “brain washed into this way of eating” and he doesn’t even want the doughnuts anymore 🙂


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